Anything this bad for you should taste a lot better. I love cheese and I love cake, but putting them together creates a piece of sludge. There's a reason we don't eat fresh oysters in dark chocolate, or garnish martinis with lamb chops, or listen to the original cast recording of Gypsy during foreplay. Sometimes the whole is less -- but much more disgusting -- than the sum of its parts.
Other reasons I hate cheesecake:
--The Cheesecake Factory.
--Its repeated use as a plot device on the annoying sitcom The Golden Girls.
--The waste of fruit on top when people try to mask the dessert's irredeemable sludginess.
--The insult to naked women when they're objectified as "cheesecake" and the unfortunate coinage of "beefcake" to describe naked men. Even hairy naked men.
Thank you, but I'd prefer some stale Entenmann's.
